Holy Bible - The Truth Really Hurts

Church Hires JK Rowling To Rewrite The Bible

The latest PR coup for Pope Francis has seen him hire famous and revered children’s author JK Rowling to rewrite the Bible.

It is hoped the author, most famous for her Harry Potter series, can make it more accessible and believable for a new generation of Catholics and Christians.

While the specifics of the rewrite are not yet known, it is believed Rowling is tasked with producing a compelling tale that young Catholics and Christians can engage with. Figures such as dementors and other popular creations may take the place of less realistic Biblical creatures such as unicorns and the leviathon.

“We are very happy Miss Rowling has agreed to the rewrite, we keenly await the first draft,” a Vatican insider told WWN.

Rowling’s selection has raised some eyebrows but the decision by Pope Francis to select the wildly popular author is mainly due to commercial concerns.

“The sales of the Jesus Christ action figure have dropped by over 200% in the last 10 years, we are in need of new, compelling and toy-friendly characters…like the dinosaur in Toy Story,” a source close to the Pope told WWN.

“Our revenue streams are shrinking so the more Hollywood-esque the better,” the source concluded.

Rowling has thus far remained tight lipped on her vision for the Bible and its merry band of characters but a number of Hollywood producers are in discussions to turn it into a movie.

In the last century many Christian leaders have offered revisions on the interpretations of many of the Bible’s passages but Rowling is expected to take a more drastic approach.

“Judas is probably going to wear a leather jacket and JK is toying with the idea of a nervous twitch or even an eye-patch. Also why have one book when can have more? She is thinking of splitting it up into 9, maybe 10 books” the author’s publicist shared with WWN.

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Recently, this 'news article' was emailed to me from a well intentioned reader as another example of the religious travesty happening around the world. So before I start to resend and spread any story myself, I always check out the facts. On occasion, I have slipped up in not checking and every time, every time, get bitten in the ass, and it's embarrassing.  Have you ever thought about who gets hurt?

                                  

Since the raw email article came to me without any credits for the editorial content or authorship noted, the pirated material took the recognition away for the creative efforts of Colm Williamson and Julius Hubris in Ireland. They are the creators and brains behind the 'Waterford Whispers News', a satirical website, who lost their identity and true intentions to humorously entertain, not alarm people with such a sham misrepresentation of their cleaver imagination.                                                                                                                    

So, not only are the originators of the materials misrepresented but the readers of the misinformation are doing a disservice by disseminating wrong ideas held out as fact. It's no wonder that the World Wide Web, or in Chinese: wàn wéi wǎng (万维网), on the Internet has not made all the readers in the blogosphere react as 'flash-mob' take-overs in stores, malls or even revolutions at the drop of a hat. Let's be honest here, how many of you have a friend who sends tons of '--Forwarded messages'--? It makes one wonder why they don't throw them into their trash cans to save others from reading them.

Remember that the next time you begin to send a "'--Forwarded message--", please check out the information source and facts before emailing it out. You are putting your good name on something that now carries your own honest word that it’s the truth; it's in a currency that's as good as gold. That's what computer hackers, malicious malware software developers rely upon to carry their insidious virus infections from one computer to another. Other computer hacks just get their jollies off knowing their absurd and hurtful stories can damage someone else's reputation; it's the 'reality show' effects for real. Then other emails are just plain stupid for a range of reasons; but mostly just dumb, dumber and dumbest.  

The 'Truth or Fiction' fact-check site reported:  The Roman Catholic Church has not asked J.K. Rowling to write a new Bible.  This is a hoax and its source is a satire website called "Waterford Whispers News" - Nothing on this website should be taken seriously. This is the disclaimer page on the site that said, "Waterford Whispers News is a fabricated satirical newspaper and comedy website published by Waterford Whispers News."

Here is a partial list of the major verification sites:

1. FactCheck.org:  a political website financed by Peter Soros, left-wing liberal.
2. Snopes.com: a site owned by the Barbara & David Mikkelson, big left-wing liberal Obama donors.
3. PolitiFact.org: owned by the Tampa Bay Times leans liberal bias.
4. FactCheck.org: a project of the Annenberg Public Policy Center of the University of Pennsylvania, an uber-liberal scholastic institution.
5. TruthorFiction.com: was founded by the late Rich Buhler, who was also known as the "Father of Modern Christian Talk Radio" at KBRT, Corona, CA. 

It is interesting to note that when you go to one fact checking 'dot com or dot org' site, it is wise to check another site too.  And, it never hurts for a quick "Google" of the subject that may bring up contrasting opinions and facts too.